Have you tried the recomendations given in the library readme?
1. Start with stiffness of 1e4 and damping of 1e2 and adjust from there.
2. Use solver ode15s, Relative Tolerance = 1e-4, Absolute Tolerance = 1e-5
and set the maximum step size to 1e-2.
3. If you get unexpected behavior (parts flying through one another,
system gaining energy) your tolerances are not small enough.
Reduce tolerances by a factor of 10 and max step size by a factor of 10
until you get expected behavior. Reducing stiffness and increasing damping
can also help.
Note that the stifness and damping parameters souhld be adjusted depanding on your solid mass.